Have you ever gone on a long run or hike without water? Or gotten to the place of true thirst? When you finally get your cool, long drink of water, you can sort of feel it washing into your body, you can feel your body being satisfied. It takes no work for water ( I mean, in America), one must simply find the water and drink it in.
Water is lifesaving, life sustaining, necessary, and again always there for many of us in the world.
Water! Do you know people that hate water? I don’t know why, but I don’t like to drink water. Many people find drinking water to be a chore. That is not the case for all people, my son Oliver is always drinking water. I remember his very first paper written in 3rd grade. Titled, “What would happen if I forgot to bring water to school.” This boy knows what it means to rely on water! Not milk, not juice, and he hates soda! (hated, past tense) He will shut down if we are out and he realizes there is no water. He cannot cope until someone has a plan to find water.
I, on the other hand, prefer to live on coffee, wine and whiskey. There is a little water in those options, right? One of my favorite people in the whole wide world, named Steve Collins, grew up in Angola and is now 80 years old, and if you ever offer him water, he quips, “Water! I never touch the stuff!” Being raised in the developing world, where unfiltered water is dangerous, might contribute to his funny ways.
I can go a whole day without actually drinking pure water, I might use it to swish around in my mouth after brushing teeth, but that’s it. Then Rachel Hollis, my insta-mentor, told me that I had to drink half of my body weight in water ounces. Ugh! That’s 60 ounces a day! Just kidding, it’s 70 ounces. Anyway, a lot. So, I try and I fail. Why? Because I’m going to water after I’ve had my fill of everything else. There is no room for it. I’ve never been able to take on this challenge. Until I started writing this blog! The patient Father always teaches me things when I am ready and willing to learn. Suddenly I found my groove and I go to water first, (after the first cup of coffee, of course.) Then for the rest of the day, I have learned to carry it around with me and go to it often. Now, it’s blowing my mind how much I love that water and need it. And how much it actually satisfies me. How did I miss this? Some days, I want more than 70oz.
Jesus compares himself to water in the conversation with the woman at the well. He said that he is the living water, if she would drink from his water, she would never thirst again. Was Jesus referring to the actual water being drawn from the well? Or was he relating to her search for connection and love in her many lovers? His love satisfies! How many of us have looked to earthly love to feel complete?
I wanted to understand this concept of nourishing myself with Jesus and his teachings. So, I had to eliminate my distractions, I started with food. I went on a 7 day fast to try to discover how I could find nourishment in Jesus or by doing the will of the father. By denying myself food, I hoped to find nourishment in spiritual ways. Three days is no time for life transformation, but it’s a start. I fasted, which is really hard, because I still had to cook and serve food to my four boys and husband. (Although John did cook many of the dinners) I served the food and went on a long walk during each meal. Asking the Lord to teach me about true nourishment. I would ask to be nourished by His everlasting Word, and the sun and the breeze, and my warm shower, and holding my kids in my lap, long conversations with my husband, and I asked that He would show me direction and His will for my life. And so began my journey of understanding that I’ve been “nourishing” myself with many other things besides food. I am a drama lover! I love a good conversation that includes a cry, I love to always put myself out there more than I can handle because it is dramatic, and it stretches me. I hate a 10 minute run, give me an hour or more! But when I’m not feeling so spiritual, I’m still a dramatic person and need that emotional fix. I go to TV and movies, especially a show about a tormented heroine who is always fighting for others and getting stuff done, to compensate for my emptiness. I also love whiskey, I think it is mainly because of the intensity, and the hunt for a not so expensive one that still goes down well. I love how strong it feels going down and the taste in the exhale through my nose right after. I’m an intense person, one who made her husband promise her if we got married, we would live in Africa for a portion of life. I like to give whole paychecks in the offering at church, not because anyone asked for it or needed it but just to practice the discipline of generosity, and to prove that I can do it.
I learned that some habits in my life are there for nourishment, like ice cream at the end of hard stressful day. Ice cream does not actually nourish me, but I go to it like it nourishes. Which only helps me feel better while I’m eating it, while the sugar is still in my system. 10 minutes later I only want another bowl, and 3 bowls later I’m more stressed that I just downed an excessive amount of ice cream. The same goes with whiskey or any substance we ingest to help us feel better at the moment.
All I’m saying is that we like to try to nourish ourselves with the easy to reach stuff. But if you are honest with yourself, it does not nourish.
Jesus says that he will satisfy, if you drink from him, you will never thirst again. Imagine a cup in a restaurant full of ice before the soda is poured. You soda lovers out there know that less ice means more soda. In the same way, if we can die to ourselves in the flesh. And move out our many fleshly desires (the ice), then we can be filled with more Jesus, not diluted Jesus.
Jesus came to the earth to show us The Way; to show us what God meant for his creation. He demonstrated connecting with the outcasts of society. Bringing power and healing to the sick and handicap, and possessed. He was filled with the Spirit and pulled away often to seek the face of the Father. Then in the most incredible scene on the cross. Jesus, the one that offers living water, said the tragic words, “I thirst.”
Jesus was thirsty. How could this be? Because in order for him to take on the sins of the world, he could not longer house the Spirit. The Holy Spirit is God and therefore sin cannot be in His presence. The Holy Spirit left Jesus to be man again—the son of man. The Son of man, took on our sin, and he was thirsty.